Unwritten

Mal: You can’t open the book of my life and jump in the middle. Like woman, I am a mystery.

… too much on my mind now; so interesting when something so seemingly small can turn a sunny day into a winter storm.

Bleh; i guess fate does have it in for me; i cant seem to find even a moment’s peace these days.

There is that old saying, “better left unsaid” but even more so- there is another saying, “Better late than never”

some things just stay down, waiting for the randomest of things to bring it to the surface.

I had a nice chat with a good friend tonight which, thankfully, changed the way i saw some parts of my past. I mean i saw it, i saw the images in my mind and hear the replay in my head; but without fully realizing it- there were many missing pieces to the puzzle. The things off in the shadows of my mind, the things i had wished i had seen then, but things i do see now.

Yesterday wasnt such a good day; but today has started off much brighter.

Today i wish to be alone; and yet i dont. Its a day that marks a change in my life; such a solemn occasion. so much of my life ive left behind now; the person i had become that i hated. I was so annoyed by people; but really mostly annoyed with myself. I look back at the lives ive effected; all the lives changed- for the better… for the worse. I see all the experiences that have led me to where i am. I dont want to change them; because i like who i am becoming now; but i wish that so many people didnt have to get hurt for me to realize it.

today is an anniversary of sorts i suppose, but there will be no celebration here.