Unwritten

I sit here awake.. thoughts triggered by another LJ i just read. Wanting to let loose and yet scared because of the small world that exists around my journals, my life. I’m no longer anonymous… or maybe i just dont perceive myself as anonymous anymore. The words of my journals come back to me somehow; but only the ones that i dont want to come back to me.. Haha.

But here i continue, one of the hopeless cases; seeming ready to spew the daily rants of their mundane and useless lives. and still here I am, one of the free thinkers of the internet, disgusted with society and government.. Tired of war and manipulation… ranting to our hearts content, and sometimes even doing something about it.

I came here alone and forgotten, a small fish in a big pond. And Now i find myself among other small fish. fish of different sizes, different races, different thoughts and different values. I’m not so alone after all am I?

With that peace of mind comes fear, fear of judgment… fear of not fitting in. Fear that my opinion will not be respected, but bashed across the digital relm.

So as my current favorite character in KOTOR II says (paraphrased since i cant remember the exact quote) “Distrust is a powerful shield against manipulation” (or something like that.. i should go play that section again to find out.. but basically, My time of blind faith in humanity and my “friends” is coming to a close… i will fall back into the era where trust must be gain and held.

This is my current favorite quote:
“In all affairs it’s a healthy thing now and then to hang a question mark on the things you have long taken for granted.”
Bertrand Russell (1872 - 1970)